Thejaswi Nayak

Why is it hard to open up when you’re depressed?

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I am no psychology expert but I know what it’s like being on the other side. Depression is so complicated, that it needs a lot of efforts to heal. In the current times, I’m glad we are openly addressing depression and mental health issues. So let’s talk about why it is so hard to open up when you’re depressed. 

1. It hurts to explain
Yes. It breaks your heart to explain what happened, why it happened, how it happened and why it made you so miserable. And every time you explain it to a new person, there are flashbacks than run in the background of your mind that traumatise you. So you choose to just keep it to yourself

2. Fear of being judged
Most of the depressed, fear the judgement that they will receive once they open up. Which is why, we often see depressed people, faking a smile like everything is perfect. Fear of Judgement creates a huge wall between real you and the version you portray to the world. 

3. You no longer feel like expressing
A lot of them become quiet, and introverted. You do not feel joy/peace in expressing your feelings. You don’t find it rewarding. Negative thoughts hover your mind every time, you think you want to vent out. You distance yourself, because you are afraid of point 1 and 2 

4. You don’t trust ANYONE!
Depression does that to you. As said above, you don’t want to express, because you don’t trust the person. Your mind gets into this virtual bubble to avoid any kind of betrayal. You just don’t let anyone get into that core. You are afraid of being hurt again and you are afraid you will break again

5. You have become Emotionally Numb
Another effect I noticed. Emotionally numb includes all the above points said, it literally makes you act like a man with a smiling mask. You are functioning perfectly in the eyes of the world but deep inside, you are so broken, so hurt and Depressed. You don’t feel happy, neither do you feel sad. You stare at the walls for hours. You cannot react emotionally, you don’t feel anger, neither do you laugh at jokes. 
All you feel is Numb inside

Dear friend, if you feel any of the above, or have a friend that has been going through a difficult time or is behaving in the ways described above. Please see a therapist. Mental health is important and YOU are important.

Story by Thejaswi Nayak

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